stitching

There are days when events make me want certain things. Rite now, for sure, it is sleep, and comfort.
The 'heart' is not a thing. There is no solid state in which we can label the 'feelings of the heart' good and not good.
I opened that broken place that my 18 year old shut up safely, and it hasn't turned out so well. I wonder if people can change, I wonder if things can truly be better and good.
But for now, I withdraw. I just sit here, on a rock near a ledge, looking over a valley and wonder. And wait.
Will this just numb out and go away? Will I be surprised? Will I learn some new way of being in this non solid state of 'Love and Heart'?
Who knows..
Not me.
Solid Life daily motions call.
I will dwell there, and Look at this stitching thread made of fear and memory in my hand... and not want to pick up the needle with which to start the sewing...