Drive

So, the rain got in, the shop got wet- I got sick. Crap. But, as I sit here in the upstairs, thinking of what to do next, my die-hard drive is kicking in. If you know me, and know me well enough, you will know that when the going gets tough (outside of relationships..) Dawn gets tough and creative. I can feel that Gypsy wind blowing telling me to throw paint around and see what comes of it. so, this I will do. That shop is going to be the damn coolest thing anyone has seen this side of the Junker Girls, and As always, it will come out of my SOul. Screw this whining, sniveling, caution stuff. I have always thrown that to the wind. I definitely will concern myself with the well-being of other's crafts and belongings, but hell- THIS IS A PARTY we live in, not a damn eggshell carpeted room. so.. welcome to this new set up, come on by, fill up your Soul, and Sing Loud with us!

Sitting in the WIndow

I can hear Blue Jay calling from outside, and am Tempted to go find him. I am Sitting at the dry-rotted Outdoor bistro set I SWORE i would not bring in from the patio of our new apartment, watching the morning unfold. It is one of my new favorite things to do. Morning, Coffee, Window. But, you know.. aside from the fact that it's falling apart (the chair seats are slowly falling through with each planting of our tushes) i like the set up.
Its the same with this whole situation. New Apartment, The Shop, Life. Maggs and I have moved into the New Apartment that was at first thought of to be WAY too small to handle the two of us (ok, me and all my stuff), but has turned out to be just rite! As it stands, there are bags of clothes and boxes of things all over, because we lack proper furniture to put them away- dressers and shelving, but hey- its ok, it will come. We have a few little house plants, a couple of fish and we are good. Dew it still with Steven, kind of miss her.. But I know, she is SO much more comfortable over there for now. We will see what happens in the future.
Its quiet here. You would think, being on THE main street, that it would be unbearably loud.. but its not. Guess Rollinsford just isnt that kind of place. We have met all KINDS of people in this amazing new venture, made such great friends. We have some wonderful friends rite here in town, just acros the street, and up the road. Maggie has actual friends her OWN age to play with- and GIRLS none the less!! it is wonderful for her. I love having friends as well, male and female for once!! The women I have met via the shop opening are so wonderful and spiritual! aahhhh..
All of this is what I have wanted for SO long. I feel like I actually Belong to a real community!! I guess I have Leanne and Isaac to thank most of all, and then down the line of all these other people that have stepped into the picture- so many, and so wonderful.
(although, I can hear Christine saying that I need to thank MYSELF first, because it all came from me... so, yes, I am thankful that I have the drive and creativity to do such things.. not to mention the imagination!)
Speaking of such people, I start an apprentiship under Christine Tolf on March 8th. :D I am super looking forward to it, more ID work, more research, more making stuff!! Yahoo! I look forward to learning more about body systems because I am not so good at clincal. see? I cant even spell it ;) I am totally down with growing things, playing with them, knowing the plants.. but Giving them to people?? I dunno? heh. Guess I didnt get that part out of my first Apprentiship. Who knows. That whole Situation is odd.. with Wendy Fogg. She came to see me on Sunday. For literally 5 minutes. It was strange- they all said it would happen, they were all rite :) She came in, put on that false face of "oh, so glad to see you..." and by the time she left, looked like Medusa. *sigh* Poor lady lives in fear, like Salandrea. Not fun. Disslike button goes here. Please, I PRAY- if I EVER get that way, someone pull me out of it, remind me of my light and then let me sit by the water for a while.
I really enjoy having older women around me, as well. Christine, Deb, Pammie, and Kris. They are like my Mothers.. Its like a Native thing, the Wise Women Council. Totally grateful for them.
Hm.. what else? well, got the SIlverado Back. Wonderful to have a truck! We have been putting lots of money into it, new tires, brakes, exhaust.. and new campershell on the way i think. (and she was running a little rough last night.. NOT looking forward to finding out what THAT is.. ok, maybe i am, just so i can get it fixed.)
Isaac is doing well, hes such a sought-after thing in his field. People chase him all the time. He comes up on the weekends, like a mini-vacation to spend time with us, and get fed. Maggie and he are bonding something amazing! I am so glad for them. He and I are getting some good relaxed talking time in, too. We have bonding nights of sitting at the little table, listening to music and yacking it up :) dig it! lots of laughter ensues! its been so fun, and I am glad it is turning out like I hoped. Thank GoD Indiana Sucked ass. ;)
Well.. I suppose thats about all.. thinking of going for a walk this morning. May be a beautifully clearing way to start the day :)
I am grateful for my friends, family, life and Love. I am Blessed a thousand times over, and I am in LOve with life. *sigh* Im so glad.

WalKinG, WatchIng, TurnIng Away.

ANd WHat caN i DO But Watch WhiLE he MaKes SucH a BliNd Mistake? NothIng. I caNNot Scream it AloUd- It WouLd FaLL onLy to DeaD Ears SilEnceD bY anImaLiStic InStinct. I DaNce ThiS naTiVe wAy- CalIche and SunSets of LightniNg and Dry BreRzEs, I WhIle aWay My HouRs FeEdinG my Soul throUgh thIS liGhT caLLed ExpreSSion. He WaTchEd aS i BliNdlY wEnt Forth inTo a DaYdrEam whIspeRed Wish, anD caUghT me WheN i FelL to knEES-BrokEn-HearT. CaN I do The SaMe WheN I'M alReaDy GoNE? So FrEE a SpiriT he LocKS awAy UndEr KeePing of PattErns coLored New. TrAde onE for AnothER, anD Be RecoVerEd. No. I dO Not AgrEE, I TurN awAy whiLe hE quOtes ThiS laTest SaVior-aNd-DistrAction caLLed Woman. I WilL neVer-ItteRate I wIlL onLy Be UndeR the Radar, anD watCh. My PeAce ShaTTereD by Things so UnknOWn DonE by CalLousEd Hands. My SaFeTy aNd SaBilIty WaLkEd ThrouGh, Mug iN hand. AnD herE i StaNd, WinD echOing, StrIppIng warmth FroM cRacKs in BricK waLL, MakIng a firSt Move to His EasE and SlidE doWn slOpe of PattErn RecogNitIon. (NoT thAt iT wiLL be Seen.) HerE i Glow. HeRe I GrOw. HerE I Flow.... anD on I walk. I CaNNot waTch, So AwAy I turN.

Saturday. Today. The sun is rising on the Eastern Horizon, and faint wisps of my dreams are still poking through the Veil, not quite to be caught. They are burning off like the fog on a spring morning.
But, the coffee in front of me will pull me up and the "shunshine" will warm my bones.
We have a Shop. We have a new apartment. We now have a full fledged life. And it's beautiful.
Tonight is the first meeting of the New England Metaphysical Group at the Shop, and I am to give the talk on "Herbology" as it was stated- now this tells me one of two things is occuring here, either the people i will be talking to dont have much of an idea about herbalism and energetics, or they know way more than I do, and Im done for. heh.
However, in true Dawnie fashion, I have decided to wow them with color, text and Magic of a true Hearth Witch. "Here-smell this!" hate it? KNOW WHY? ;)
I always wait until the VERY last minute to do things like this, i am SO uninspired before then. I layed in bed last night thinking and waiting for inspiration, and Poof! of course it came! ;)
The shop is going fantastically. January is slow, but it is to be expected for the first January in it's 3 month life. ( not even three months yet, actually!) Its beautiful inside, altho i think it's getting a tad cluttered in the windows.. I must get up the plant shelves. I have been very much so enjoying the people I meet, the friends we have made. We have visitors all the time, and it is wonderful. The Mountain women came down last night and brought us crystals from a chandelier for the windows to sell! how wonderful! Our major classes are starting, Christine's Flower essence class is net Saturday, Steven is going to build me folding screens for room division. First Thursday is starting Feb. 4th in Rollinsford! Knitting is tomorrow, Deb holds a Herbal day spa on the 6th, Tarot gets read again on the 31st by Kelley Talylore; sooo much! and its so nice!
And the awesomest thing- we rented the apartment above the shop! Maggs and I will be there full time soon! (well, almost full time, we will be here at Stevens a couple days a week, and there 5 i think... Stevo still needs us for a bit ;). I have already hung the wind chime, and as soon as the bath tub gets taken care of, we re in! :) And I have to say, my land lords are so wonderful. I really enjoy working with the Owners of the Salmon Falls Mills.. and I hear we will have a ton of space opening in the lower mill! Time to get some new recruits! :)
hm... what else? not much, the sun is coming more and more every day, the weather has been more mild this past few days- OH! and I am getting the Silverado all for my own! how happy am I?? Jumping up and DOWN for joy! :D I loooove the Silverado!
ok, over and out! gotta get ready for el day a gogo at el shoppy a gogo!

Im starting to notice a Pattern in the winters. When weather starts to settle into a cold sameness and a closed-in feeling of solid sets its feet, I start to look more closely at things and notice detail. Patchauli becomes a major part of my life at this time of year. Why? Because it smells like dirt and trees... a scent missing from my every day in the winter. The ground is frozen, I cannot reach the soil, so I substitute with memory. I go inside and use images and feeling to subsidize the lack of Tree-Talks, and Sun-Soaks. I know I could still go outside, but I seriously dislike the cold. Going outside to visit the Trees and Mother & Brother is a special treat and occasion in the Winter. Summer finds all windows open all the time, There is no separation at that time.

This past few weeks... :)

Wow, What a crazy past few weeks! i didn't have anything to write about until i sat here at 9 am three weeks ago talking with Leanne and decided to meet her to talk about opening a space. Then- BLAM! rushing, whirlwind, quickness, hard work, talking and planning, sleeping and eating here and there, and finally- OPEN THE DOOR! And this past weekend happened. Our Herbal Shop is OPEN. A Real, Bonified Herbal shop. It should sound Strange to me, it probably should feel shocking and weird. But it doesn't- it feels completely comfortable, not foreign at all. Maybe because I've done similar things before, organizing and pulling people together. Or, maybe- more on my line of thinking - It feels normal, Because it IS normal. "you know what is for you by how it feels" - and it can't get more normal feeling than this :)
I have been supremely Blessed with the Love and Support of my family and friends in all of this. My family has been so supportive and Helpful with Maggie, and my friends have pitched in to bring the shop together. I couldn't ask for better people in my life. Even those who are not rite here in New Hampshire have been so supportive and encouraging. I really know the encouragement of people like Alyssa and Heather and others who have Ordered from Sun Moon Stars, have helped my drive in the business so much, they keep me on track (especially rite now with the Holiday Line!! ) I feel a drive to get things done with them standing behind me, they make me to know my work Matters. Between them and the people i have met Via the shop coming together and the people coming into the shop (the rekindled friendships-like Mary :) ) , I know i am so richly Blessed. I am so happy that people are as joyful about all of this as I am. *sigh* I love it.
I look forward to next weekend as well- The Rollinsford/South Berwick Christmas Parade! I will be ordering more bulk herbs this next week, and restocking sold items from the SMSH Family, and Myself. I get to make Lip Balms (candy cane! WOOHOO!) and Scrubs, and Body Butters this week :D
Oh, hahaha! and its Nisu Week! Wednesday, I will be making Nisu for my Family. I have to make an extra t-ring to send with Eddie to Work :D I will, of course, cry cause I will miss A&E, but Maggs will be helping, so It's OK. dang it, thinking about it makes me miss them already. Poo.
well, just wanted to update, so I could thank everyone for their amazing help and to say I'll be back to a bit more norm mow, because Its up and running - so i don't have to. :) upkeep is one thing, promotion and new product and classes. But the renovation and set up is done. *whew* it's like building a house, and filling it. Now, its done and all it needs is up keep and continual excitement and input and energy!!
I am looking forward to the workshops and classes. I will do more and more advertising of course. It has to be a continual movement, there wont be any stillness in the place! :D (could there be with me abound??) ;)